the layered complexity of divine love

i have done this before: continually urged myself to progress,
accepting that there would be ups & downs, blessings lost & blessings found.
i am not new to this journey, neither do i rejoice nor complain.
there is really no choice, for basically i follow my own nature:
that which i genuinely want to do, which circumstances call forth.

the mind is programmed by life to respond in certain ways, according
to the situation set-up of this dreamlike domain of jagat.
there is great joy in expressing within the flow of ones own nature,
feeling the fullness of energy building & its smooth streaming forth
to evolve, flower & fruit, & gladly to share the final harvest.

once i stood before a tapestry hundreds of miles in length & width.
i contemplated a single square inch of it & found fault & flaw,
no meaningful pattern or redeeming quality could i find there.
You, Shiva, came to me & took my hand, pulling me along with You.
You showed me such vast sweet glory that the budding inner self quickened
& blossomed in the light of it all, in the wonder & radiance.

I saw that the whole vast pattern seamlessly included even that
single small inch too &, at that moment of direct knowing, i ceased
judging what i perceived & began to rejoice in the layered
complexity of divine love & in You, Shiva, my authentic,
inclusive, good, pure, vital, vibrant, enduring connection to wholeness.

so it is that i simply take what comes into my life & love it
into a meaningful pattern, to the best of my ability.
i earnestly move forward toward You who have called me & to whom
i have given all that i am now & all that i may yet become.
this writing chronicles it, for there is no other journey for me.

a rough piece of rock

You blast through my protective wall of words & strip me clean
of concepts, removing me from my comfort zone, Shiva!
You are revealed to me now, human attachments laid bare,
withering in the pure fire of Your seal upon my heart.

every happening in this life is a teaching from You.
this jiva, a rough piece of rock, is polished to become
a shining jewel in the fullness of time & process.
love without attachment or expectation is Your gift
& i learn, i learn from pain & from delight, i do learn.

You blast through my protective wall of words & strip me clean
of concepts & guide me toward my holy home, Shiva,
where no "i" or "You" remain, only the dancing wholeness.