finally i find myself here at this wall with no door, looming before me so high that i cannot see the top. i have explored in all directions, roaming relentlessly, & each time i have come to that wall that has no door. no matter where i journey, the wall stands tall. i think that i take it with me, this towering wall that is built from a lifetime's conditioning & propaganda. i am like a turtle, carrying my protection. i can hide within it & never be caught in the open where danger can descend swiftly, like a fierce raptor from the clear blue cloudless sky. cracks now breach the wall & they are spreading, deepening every day. i can see light shining through the larger cracks & it flickers most temptingly in a code i'm called to decipher. in this way, the wall becomes my teacher, inviting me to heightened awareness. hence, a wall can make a prison or a fortress, depending on the point of view. for now, i am simply relieved to discern this wall & to know that it will crumble & fall when Shiva sees that the time is ripe for it. until then, please forgive me for all that i have left unsaid & for all that i cannot unsay today.
i rise into flight & i break into song, into a thousand thousand pieces. they all have their own holy lives & they have their own wings as they fly off to do their own duties. surely songs are free beings with their own dharma after they emerge from the lips: they have their own journeys to set out upon. i carried them all when they were tender & small & it's time now to let them go free. i break out of the prison i carefully made out of rules, roles & regulations. i'm cutting the cords; i'm leaving the matrix. i'm fully out of the chrysalis now, shedding the confining tight old skin & spreading my wings into the rising sunlight. they glow & they know just where to go, & i am but a passenger. Shiva, these wings will take me to You: what else can be their purpose? what else can they do but take me to You? that's what this life is for.