Tag: nursing home

out of this world

the occasion of covid finds us again at this nursing home. covid
is a great respecter of age, finding mature elder bodies to be
the very best hosts: simply too tired to refuse entry, so come on in!

it is surely the way of nature of the elderly to make way for
the new generations of fresh young bodies to carry on. they have the
strength & resilience to do the most necessary things in this world.
caring for it comes to them now: to these lively & eager fresh fledglings
who flex their ready muscles & minds as they wait for their turn in the sun.

in the meanwhile, at nursing homes throughout the struggling world,
the designated elderly await their journeys home to the pure land
where all bodies are composed of luminous light & originate from
the universal refulgence, starshine, & from Shiva's abiding love.

but weep not, for there is no suffering, & this fateful transition comes
to all of us in good & proper time, like a graduation party
after the most difficult course ever encountered at university.
now our preparation is over & done, the course is completed &
graduation is in the past. we are now freed from old obligations.

nature has taken its given course. all is well in the vaster holy
realm wherein we find our true home of the heart. it is far beyond the
portal that covid opened to us for a brief time, yet it works well for
our sacramental homecoming. Shiva waits for us there to welcome us
with song & dance! i hear that the music & light show is out of this world!

side by side

this peaceful old hippie is also the daughter & wife of career soldiers.
thus have i landed here in this military nursing home for old soldiers.

it's clear to me from Shiva's teaching that this body & the circumstances
of its birth are not who i really am, but is the role that has been given.

in outer action due respect is offered, while inwardly it can be seen
as karmic duty until awakening. Shiva's hand propels the action.

There's no limitation to the inner life, & culture is shed like old skin.
outwardly the role is well fulfilled & the long social dance is nearly done.

hippie & soldier live side by side when the dust of the battle has settled.
ideals, livelihood & bodies are but props in this grand play of maya.

yet still i speak of my love for Shiva: He rises in my heart like the sun.
my hands lift up in namaste & the warm light of His love pours freely down.

the heart will hold fast

today is a time of courage when i resolutely determine
to remain alert, not to get lost in memory & mind chatter.
over & over i return to my mantra, the lifeline which You
have given me, to which i cling in the intense storms of circumstance.

i dwell in a nursing home, an imperiled place in a pandemic,
yet nonetheless You remain close when i can see beyond the surface
to the divine timing that cares less for the unit than for the whole.
remaining in an old worn body is not important. You alone
are truly essential & i shall not lose my way back home to You!

birth, death, body, spirit: the dance patterns of cosmic complexity,
& i can no longer freestyle full out but seek now to rest in You.
You are the center of the turning wheel & i will not lose focus
upon You. although passing events may obscure, the heart will hold fast.

the heart will hold fast when hands no longer find a solid place to grip.
thus today is a time of courage when i devote myself to You.
i am here for You. i do not fear the homeward journey of return
for this script has long been written as the time to merge myself in You.
the sun only sets for the earthbound & i am a child of the stars.

nursing home life

i see the people who live here & the people who work here
coming & going, coming & going, like a human tide.
this is nursing home life, the last stronghold of the weary form,
the final chance for deconstruction & renunciation
of body-self identification, countdown to release
the encumbrances of earthly life. i seek to use it well.

the intention is to show that it's never too late to serve
the vast Beingness interpenetrating all life & form.
names & shapes come & go, ebb & flow, yet the Nameless remains.
the Nameless comes forth to us all through the veil of name & form,
therefore Shiva has come to me even through my ignorance.
i honor this time & the One who holds me like a lover.

He is here & i will go with Him when the tide rushes out.
names & shapes come & go, ebb & flow, yet the Nameless remains.

pandemic lll

this is a global culling event,
a time of physical alertness,
a time of challenge to compassion.
this is a time when the greater good
for the greatest number is questioned
& ignored by many who value
personal will above group service.

do You call me to You now, Shiva?
am i one of the expendable ones
in this intense global culling time?
i am old, an economic drain,
if the material world counts most.
my offered gifts are not tangible,
nor do they serve current social needs.
Shiva, i am glad You came to me
& i will freely return to You
whenever You call me to come back.

what a drama of the human heart
are these times of global suffering!
it is no doubt a good time to die,
thus i stand with You, at peace myself.
the body is all Yours anyway,
always has been & always will be.
i am content & ready to leave,
to return to You who are my source.
let be what is needful, use me well!
gratitude to You is what remains
& in this world, that is sufficient.

pandemic II

here i am, Shiva!
covered with tissue
wrapped in thick cotton
tied up with strong twine
placed in a small box
hidden on a shelf
in a secured room
in a sealed safe house
on a quiet street
in the far outskirts
of a small city
known to very few.

this nursing home life!
protected & guarded
like national treasure
which cannot be touched!
touch me now, Shiva!
You have compassion
for the outcast ones
who live in shadow
yet rejoice in light.
here i am, Shiva!

blessing

because the body is now old
i reside in a nursing home.
i look back over my lifetime,
piecing its events together
from a wide-angled perspective.
i don't look at other's judgements
but at the many blessings that
You have given to me, Shiva.

now i have sufficient distance
from all the stories & events
to see that they all point to You.
no others have seen this for me
or could see it from the outside.
neither did i see it until
old age slowed me down & illness
forced me to change my point of view.

with Shiva enthroned in my heart,
pulling the veils away slowly,
i see disaster transform to
positive redirection, grace.
i observe shame disappearing
in the light of understanding.

i see You in all that happens
through revelation & insight.
i see Your graciousness to me
even during my ignorance.

my life is now service & gift
when i look through the clear lens
that reveals the arcane patterns
of blessings concealed from the world
& the slicing gaze of skeptics.
behind the apparent events
i see Your divine hand at work,
hidden from the sight of others,
signaling to me of Your love.

i am grateful, my Lord Shiva!
i am grateful You came to me,
that You taught me & guided me
throughout this long life that others
could neither comprehend nor bless.
You are all that i desire &
all that i seek or attend to.
You have chosen me as Your own
& i rest in Your protection.
You are the heart of this life
& all that i need & want.

lullabies

the sounds of a nursing home late at night echo
dull background humming of central climate control
murmur of someone's tv down the long hallway
sharp clatter of an object falling to the floor
a soft low moaning cry in a frail shaking voice
the quick rhythm of a nurse's hurried footsteps
sudden boom of thunder & hard rain drumming down.
the musical tones in my head rising falling
focussed mind repeating my beloved mantra
singing silent sacred lullabies to Shiva
in the warm arms of the transformative darkness
om namah Shivaya on namah Shivaya