some seeds must be watered thoroughly by our tears before they can sprout:
the darkness & moisture are needed before the heat of the bright day.
things soften & fall away in the salty wetness of flowing tears.
it's too early for the light, too early for words to begin pulling
things apart or holding them together by dogged force & grim grit.
first must come the quickening tears, the basic form of the fertilizer
of the soul, for growth needs abundant moisture to support suppleness.
let the tears well up & flow. something inside is moving towards birth,
struggling slick & wet into the soft dark blanket of the deep night.
You know about tears, Shiva. You know what a cleansing release they bring.
You know that they have healing properties & a holy origin.
i will rest in You, Shiva, & the tears will serve Your purpose as i
do japa of Your sacred mantra on my rudraksha seed mala.
when i am meditating in my room or doing japa of Your name,
i am heartened by the subtle ways that You gently reveal Your presence.
here within these walls may drift the rich leafy-fresh scent of forest after rain.
there may be a slow warm touch upon the cheek as if You are here by me.
perhaps i suddenly feel Your heat melting the ancient chill in my heart,
or i look out the window & see the clouds spelling Your name in holy
script upon the sky. sometimes an almost-visible blessing wave may roll
through me & i open my heart as wide as i can for love to pour out.
i am nourished by You, Shiva, & i want to share Your kindness freely.
OM NAMAH SHIVAYA