
Shiva, You have given me instructions all these many years, which i have been slowly guided to piece together meaningfully. i was so young & ignorant at the beginning, with much to learn & to integrate. of course, there was & is the continuing pressing need to mature into my highest potential. it continues to this day & is still incomplete, yet nonetheless it does provide a sound foundation. it's more than i had ever hoped for, or dreamed of before. Shiva, i understand that You are many beings & things, all at the same time. it is that way in the higher refined dimensions of existence. You can be God, You can be my cherished inspiration, companion, teacher, comedian & also my own true divine identity, all at the same time. the human brain rather struggles to reconcile that immensity with what we can see around us. i do struggle to accept that God would come to me. How could i be so worthy? yet, why not me? why should i condemn myself so quickly? Shiva keeps on bringing these issues to my attention, showing me how i limit myself by my own attitudes, encouraging me. Shiva teaches me that i am none of the things that arise from or affect the body; that belongs to the personality. i'm not the body nor the personality. Shiva assures me that i'm the Life that animates the body, & He has taken me out of the body to reveal other dimensions of being, all so pure & beautiful. it changes my life to know of this immensity, opens me up as if i'm a fresh young flower in morning sunshine. i can't go back to that outworn way of life that was so defined by denial. i no longer can stifle the urge to go beyond the obvious, to climb the mountain, explore the cave, commune with the stars, seek the ineffable & yearn after the real originating source of this living, longing totality which reaches out to me. hence, Shiva, i am Your willing student. i guess that is a bit like the body's left hand telling the right hand that it is willing to work with it. the mind is challenged to understand & accept such blended interconnection. it's best just to allow the mind to rest. Shiva, You are the One Who is really in charge with Your long game of rising & falling civilizations. i am but a small part of You, who has been brought along for the ride & to help. i am teachable & i am willing. please do continue Your instructions so that i may be even more effective for You in Your long game, as well as from day to day. the kali yuga is not going to last forever!