if i were to immerse myself in a cyberspace virtual world, it would be akin to what i am doing here in this world of the western mindset. here i train the body to be the compassionate detached observer of life's unfolding events through the various daily dramas. i seek to navigate them consciously & kindly. this brings the exit door of maya's theater of thrills into view & more options become available, other levels of the game.
i search for the source & essence of that which captivates my desire. where does all this creation come from? how does it originate? how else to find out than to venture deeply within, beyond the realm of maya's dramas to the emanating inner point of awareness? by way of immersion into the secret chamber of the heart, i find Shiva, the lord of the animal body, who abides therein. He shepherds me through the iterations of change to the very source.
Shiva has various names & forms & they are all teachers & guides. when i turn my focus inwards, away from the changing outer world towards the realm within myself, Shiva likewise turns His face to me in the way that i can best resonate with & respond to. i have guidance & the warm sustenance of subtle divine companionship.
Shiva is the steward of virtual reality, counting this one i find myself in at the birth of this body. He is quite set upon awakening me to my full potential of awareness. i accept His offer! Let the good times roll in total immersion!
Shiva, when You gave me this sadhana of sharing my journey with You by way of poetry in a blog, it deepened my life. i thought of wordpress as a platform for creating a webpage. i did not realize that it is also a community of people sharing their insights & life events from various perspectives & interests, yet all with respectful courtesy.
poetry especially fosters this acceptance, for it is like a finger pointing to something vital & heartfelt, as there is the openness of disclosure & the freedom to share.
along with this, our culture & society tend to promote focus on the gender differences between men & women. in my sadhana on this path of Sanatana Dharma, i'm detaching from the body-mind identity & sharing as the observer & witness to the daily drama of this life.
because of this, i did not choose to reveal the body gender. there have been times when gender has been assumed & i am addressed as "sir". since i greatly value truth, i did add "wife & mother" to my bio under the menu choice "this happened: the story". this is where i look when i read a blog, so this seemed a good place.
Shiva, i find that each level of growth & evolution brings the deep work of intensifying clarity & compassion. it's like climbing a mountain, to discover a vast expanse of mountains & plateaux going on & on into the far distance.
yet it's only the next step that i need to concern myself with. so i focus on Your companionship, Shiva, holding Your hand, walking on this path of inner unfoldment, always attending to the very next step, seeking harmony & rapport with You.
Shiva, You know me by my energy-signature & essence. i am grateful. the form is not important but the purity of intention does matter. thank You for this opportunity to be forthcoming & visible to others in service & gratitude to You. OM NAMAH SHIVAYA
to me You have no form, though i love the forms ascribed to You.
You are essence, presence, numinous energy signature.
You are within me as i move in the vast ocean of You.
You signal to me through clouds & i reply in semaphore.
my whole life is a semaphore, an action-adventure play
designed to get Your attention, to call You to see my need.
i tire of action & searching & i turn within to rest.
so it is that in the calm of this silence, You come to me. You come.
You come like the breeze, like dew at dawn, like the stars emerging
out of nothingness into somethingness, calling out my name.
You wrap around me as if skin, & i breathe You like the air
until i grow bright as the crescent moon shining in Your hair,
placed in the darkness of Your hair, no longer able to speak,
silently rejoicing in You who are hidden in all forms.
You are essence & presence, evoking deep recognition.
You call Your own & i respond, fighting through forgetfulness.
i continually move forward, slowly & steadily.
Your energy is my primal imprint, marking me for You.
i am Your agent of transformation coming home to You.