pandemic #1

You have placed me in the fire before --
this is not the first time, Beloved.
Many join me -- we are a bonfire!
we are all so brightly burning now
that the fire can be seen from space.
this is a good time to get lighter,
to be burned clean of impurity,
to discover how shiny we are
beneath the blackening of surface
slowly taking place in our world now.
arrogance is consumed in this blaze
as it rages in global cleansing.
Your fire burns pure, my Beloved --
i give myself to You willingly --
my life has always been Yours to use.
may this burning-ground be a blessing
in the big picture we can't see yet.
Lord Shiva, dance Your tandava now!
dance us into global renewal!

spilling out in these words

i live in a small room
where my walls call Your name.
Your footprints cross my floor,
hidden from others' eyes.
Your imprint on my bed
& likewise on my chair,
only my eyes can see.
i paint & draw Your face
& write poems to You.
i call Your holy name
& sing Your sacred songs.
I look within, deep down,
& all i see is You.
You are in my darkness
& You are in the light.
You are breathing through me,
You are beating my heart.
Your presence is coursing 
through my veins as i write,
spilling out in these words
through the pen on paper.
Lord Shiva, i am Yours,
marked by You before birth,
living for You on earth.

You held me

You seemed to me like royalty,
i hunkered in the dirt.
You told me of Your love for me,
i was lost in my hurt.
i hid my face, You drew me close,
You held me to Your heart.
Your glory seemed too much for me,
i kept myself apart.

You came to me repeatedly,
my heart was tightly furled.
i turned my back & gathered up
the treasures of this world.
then came the day i lost it all
but You still yet remained.
You cut the chains that bound my heart,
You healed me of my pain.
You made a doorway in my wall,
a temple in my heart.
i yield myself to You humbly,
i am Your work of art.

i knew i was not lost


i knew i was not lost
though they told me i was.
i knew that i was blessed
though they said i was cursed.

i lived my days with them
essentially unseen,
courting the mystery
ceaselessly calling me,
utmost magnet of love
attracting constantly.

i am aware of You --
i feel You in my heart
& in my brain & bones.
You stroke me with soft wind,
You sway in the shadows
& You blaze in the sun.
You call me from hiding
& stand me before You,
naked in my yearning,
stripped of human learning.
i am Yours, returning,
open like a plowed field
ready to receive seed.

I knew I was not lost.
I knew that i was blessed.
I knew that it was You
who comes to me at last.

why i am sharing this nontraditional spiritual journey

  • to encourage anyone, anywhere, in their exploration of the spiritual path that calls to them even if others don’t understand. you are not alone.
  • to inform other seekers that the regular writing of poetry about the relationship with your Deity of choice can enrich life tremendously. the same is true about painting and drawing images of the Deity of your choice. it can bring the relationship alive & facilitate deeper communion.
  • to demonstrate that sincerity & devotion in this approach to the spiritual is fundamental & more essential than talent or skill in writing or art.
  • to urge especially those who are in the latter years of life to deepen the focus on the nonphysical spiritual realm. poetry & art can help greatly with this.
  • to express & fulfill my dedication & devotion to Shiva, who has shown me all that i have painted & written about. He began with the nonverbal intuitive paintings, continued with the verbal expressive poetry & now moves to the global cyber realm. this is my service to Shiva, the Deity of choice who guides my life. may you be inspired & energized in your own explorations & journey! namaste!