i was wearing my long flannel nightgown,
almost awake in the early morning.
it was the winter of my fourteenth year
in the cold desolation of my wild soul.

You came to me. You came to be the hinge
on the opening door of my young heart.
You folded Yourself around me gently
& drew me close to You, until my breath
was Your breath & the emptiness was gone.
it was filled with Your fragrance & Your taste.
You wrapped Yourself around me, You cherished
me & Your heat melted me, melted me.

Your heat melted me, purified my heart.
You filled me up & burned the past away.
You marked me with Your transcendental love.

Shiva’s gift

a girl who is me at age fourteen
begins to awaken from sleep.
she is taken on a journey --
there is movement toward a being.
there is awareness & consciousness,
there is You, a beacon calling
in timeless, spaceless, placeless flow.
steadily i am pulled toward You.
You are all there is to me now --
You are a magnet, i am iron.
i come to You, ever closer.
this awareness is filling me up!

approaching You, converging now,
we blend into no me & no You,
just endless Being remaining,
& completeness, all-embracing love.
only belonging exists now
& grand radiant goodness & love.
there is no "i" within that realm,
yet i am there forever it seems.
i still remain there, even now,
so deeply am i touched, implanted,
marked by Your love & pure presence.

in my elderhood in this earth realm
i see what a treasure You gave
& celebrate Your light gratefully.
You are the gardener of my soul
& i am blooming for You, Shiva!