the light & the ashes

i now rise up from the ashes of purification, another
layer of ancient error burned away. again, in this manner, the
sadhana continues: a rising into the noon of consciousness
after descent into the dark interior to enkindle light.

darkness ever comes in service to light. they circle like dance partners
in the most ageless ritual union our ancestors understood.
Shiva, i come forth as Your shakti in a pure primordial way,
as Parvati, Her holy self, also does. it is long ordained thus:
that the seemingly separate polarities blend as one in truth, &
we all rise in time from the ashes of divine purification.
sadhana sincerely continues, in both the light & the ashes.

a narrow slice

i see such a narrow slice of life: in essence, a micro-reality,
the tiny zoomed-in view of a single pixel on its little adventures
in wonderland. with education, training & practice, the questing pixel
of me can see ever more extensive hierarchies of agreed-upon
participation. so many configurations seem possible, & with
eager caution i try a selection of them. but i see such a narrow
slice of reality that the choices seem quite limited indeed. what if
i turn my focus from the various choices of configuration to
the source of them all? what if i shift my attention from the activity
itself to That which is the originating source of it, the focal point?
what underlies & overlights all this strange dreamlike realm? i am ready for
awareness of a larger slice of existence & i set out to find it.

psychoactive substances can offer a preview, an in-depth sample. they
can indeed reveal more & can encourage one to walk the spiritual
path. yet the real deep inner work must be done in every state of consciousness.
it must be the sincere application of devoted intelligence, plus
the focussed desire to realize the central divine essence of the vast
complex surrounding multiplicity that we find ourselves held within.
as for my narrow little pixel-sized slice of reality: i embrace
it & honor it as best i can with what i've got, & then i set it free.

i have done this for years & finally, now at last, You have told me Your name,
& You are truly an amazing wild card! Shiva! this is the best plot twist
ever in my life! that which i had considered could somehow be imagined
is now brought to light & stands revealed like Mount Kailash when the clouds part & the
sun touches its face in kinship. Shiva! it really is You, taking me
beyond the old maya of unworthiness. "why pick me?' i would ask, feeling
that a mistake had been made. yet here i must also acknowledge, "why not me?"
for it's only through Your holy grace, Shiva, that the puzzle pieces are placed
together & the picture emerges completely. this is Your grace alone.
i am a spark of Your sacred flame, alight in gratitude, burning with love.
my narrow slice of reality stands as a portal into You, Shiva.

when i was a whale

webb space telescope
when i was a whale in the pure blue-green depths of the ocean,
i would listen to the brilliant burning stars in the midnight
sky singing their melodious nocturnes. the stars inspired me
to respond, & that is how our vocal ensemble began.
this was many kalpas before the earth took such a dense &
definite form. everything was more permeable then, joined
yet by etheric strands of willingness & humility.

i sang with the stars in a harmony of clear crystalline
tones & sonorous gut-deep moans. we would send our voices out
into the ethers like a school of fish spreading out to bless
& explore wondrous new realms. we were a net of consciousness
in a vast ocean of love, those many long kalpas ago.

when i was a whale in the pure blue-green depths of the ocean,
hungry & yearning, i sang with the stars until nothing was
left but sound & light. we would combine & melt together in
a vast harmonic oversong that continues to resound.
it is rooted in our ancestral dreamtime & even yet
flourishes here, in the midst of this current deep density.

Shiva, You taught the stars to sing & then they taught me, way back
when i was a whale in the ancient ocean in that early
version of earth. i still recall the holy magic of that
great cosmic outpouring of sound, & i rejoice in it yet.

memories of that age are woven deep down within the strands
of dna, still resonant with that timeless euphoric
blending of amicable entities. they join sea & sky
in their dulcet pulsing music of light & sound, aimed like an
arrow at the target of the heart. thank you for this, Shiva!

eyebrows & galaxies

"there are galaxies swirling in Your eyebrows," she remarks teasingly
to Shiva, Who blesses her with His acceptance. she elaborates,
"we are everywhere, like space. we blend in telepathic rapport &
communion, which is dimensionless & beyond measurement. we are
formless pure consciousness." she continues: "eyebrows & galaxies are
artifacts of the physical plane, temporary & changing with
time." she glances at Shiva & is encouraged to go on when He
smiles invitingly. "both eyebrows & galaxies also have pleasing curves
whose beauty hints at sattvic energy," she says, drawing a deep breath.
"& they both are made of many smaller parts that constitute the whole."

"i'm claiming that seeing galaxies swirling in Your eyebrows is like
saying, 'You Who are formless & cosmic are also approachable
here on the limited level of the physical plane.'" she nods for
emphasis. "seeking You & communing with You places me in that
auspicious cosmic curve too—that sattvic smile—& is like being bathed
in blessings." she shyly continues, "Shiva, You radiate such sweet
sattvic energy that complete good will & loving responsiveness
is very natural in Your presence." she winks at Him with a smile.
"& You draw the playfulness out with the warm magnetism of Your
acceptance." Shiva chuckles & winks back. "if eyebrows & galaxies
are so closely connected," He remarks, "you can be sure, with the right
effort, to reveal that all is truly one down at the deep taproot."
"You mean," she says, "that i am You & You are me & we are all
together?" she grins, "you got it!" Shiva laughs, "now let's go have fun in
maya's marvelous mesmerizing drama of the day!" so it goes,
continues & ever begins yet again. om namah Shivaya!

the open door of my waiting heart

i welcome You, Beloved, to the open door of my waiting heart.
all has been cleaned & blessed, Shiva. the air is scented with sandalwood
& flowers are heaped in woven baskets: gardenias & hyacinths,
roses & violets, honeysuckle & wisteria. i am
drunk with the celebration of flowers, their laughter like tiny bells,
their presence honoring You, Beloved who lives deep within. You are
the raw living fire of consciousness, burning me sweetly, lifting me
gently. i am Yours to consume utterly, to imbibe & savor.

in this way i return to You, origin & source, who give me life
even before time begins, bringing gifts of flowers & love that has
no beginning or end but swallows us all fully into itself.
here i am again, Beloved! let's dance this dance where two become one
without a second & all melts into love scented with sandalwood.
i welcome You, Beloved, to the open door of my waiting heart.
 

a thousand thousand stars

nasa image
at night i gaze into the eyes of a thousand thousand stars
& they see through my eyes & through the coiled array of dna
that is threaded throughout each human, animal & plant being.
the stars are looking out through my eyes into this very moment
& it's cosmic reunion time for the multidimensional!

we are so casual, striding as if we are the ones in charge
& not shadows stumbling through the dying fires of fading empires.
You show me such inclusive cosmic glimpses that i am humbled.
i cling to You, Shiva, as if an innocent newborn being.
each day i remind myself that i am the pure divine energy
that enlivens the body & not the flesh, blood & bone itself.
day after day i inform myself of truth & i move forward,
releasing millennia of body-based interpretations.
i do this as my contribution to galactic well-being.

at night the eyes of a thousand thousand stars gaze deep into me.
i am here, i tell them, to share new adventures in consciousness
for this brave age that labors to give birth to a new paradigm.