lying fallow

sometimes i am a garden lying fallow after harvest,
stripped of my nourishing abundance. my leaves are brown & crisp,
stalks & stems are brittle & broken, scattered on the resting
earth as a testament to blessings given generously.

i can breathe into the earth even when i cannot reach for
the shining sky, so i go deep, deep down past the spent dry roots.
i sleep, forgetful of bright springtime & sun, returning the
physical substance to its origin. i dream. i dream of
You, Shiva, Who planted me here & cultivated my pure
essence & reaped my natural bounty. it has emerged from
tiny hard seeds hidden in the darkness of the ground, & grown
to lift many arms & hands up to praise the sun & honor
the moon. it has been glorious, & i thank You, Shiva, as
i release the firm form into the cool darkness & soft dust
of the waiting earth. lying fallow is also part of the
process that yields the next abundant harvest in its own time.

hold me, Shiva. hold me as i rest quietly without care,
dreaming of formlessness & freedom from this human dharma.

the eggs of a strange bird

some blessings are so amazing that i don't recognize them
as blessings for years, sometimes even decades. they are like the
mystic eggs of a strange bird, bound to hatch in their own time, placed
in the nest of me, knowing not what may come from them or when.

i have seen blessings change into challenges overnight &
challenges throw off their concealment to emerge as blessings.
therefore i will rejoice in the gifts of the moment, holding
them lightly that they may fly when they are called by destiny.
You teach me to regard blessing & challenge with equal eyes,
Shiva: as opportunity in disguise, to be esteemed.
i cannot court one without bowing to the other also.

we are all golden beneath the dust, deeply imprinted with
the urge to evolve into wholeness. there is no turning back,
no refusal to be what i yearn to be & am at heart.
i will protect these strange eggs, Shiva, & will accept what may
come from them with gentle respect for their divine origin.

the windows & doors of the world

we are the ones who keep the windows & doors of the world open
to new realities asking to enter & be acknowledged.
we are Shiva's followers, His devotees who have been dismissed from
the orderly world of known borders & allowed actions.
we are the outliers, the explorers & the outrageous ones
who will not be contained within the rulebook of society.
we are the ones who keep the windows & doors of the world open
for the mysterious divine beings who, like us, cannot be
contained within common limits, hence we are Shiva's acolytes.

He has given us a place of honor within His sacred life,
unlike the earthly, worldly realm of organized reality,
to demonstrate that no one is rejected or abandoned or
forgotten. all beings who seek truth & the real are welcome to
Shiva's band of followers & companions of deep mystery.
the abode of truth is so vast that nothing is left out & none
is ever really a solitary wandering being,
for we all travel in a vast reciprocal companionship
of interconnected life. Shiva, Your attendants salute You!
we are the ones who keep the windows & doors of the world open,
allowing free circulation of all the mixed blessings of life.