i stroll across the harvested cornfield on the way home from my
meditation with the mother hemlock tree in shelter valley.
i come to a halt near the massive old oak tree by the fence line
& peer up at the clear sky. i see a hawk flying low overhead,
firmly grasping a writhing snake in its powerful talons. i
stand amazed, fixed in place, watching. i know that this is an omen.
a week later, standing on the lawn, i see & feel the hundred
year old oak tree crash to the ground in the field with a great sharp crack!
it shakes like an earthquake beneath my feet: yet another omen.
something big is coming, i think to myself. it is getting close.
it is just two more weeks until the world trade towers are brought down,
using hijacked airplanes as fearsome juggernauts of destruction.
of course there are omens. there are always omens when we are part
of something this big that needs the balm of our healing energy
helping to mitigate the shock & damage. some of us have the
ripe destiny to invoke positive & strengthening blessings
from divine helpers, & not to give in to anxious fearfulness.
Shiva, You can always use us as first responders, although our
response is energy, not words or physical activity.
we drench the noosphere with healing, with compassion & kindness.
You have placed us here as buffers against the travail of these hard
times, Shiva. we are the unlikely assistants in this rugged
aftermath of covid too, whose quiet service goes unnoticed,
yet forms the foundation for all that follows in this birthing time.
words are useful to describe the surfaces of things & how they
function. words are all about things: physical things, emotional
things, mental things & how they can combine into new things: ideas,
governments, stories, music, spaceships. it goes on & on & on.
deep down inside ourselves, fluidity & flow take place beyond
the known boundaries of the mind. here, the new & surprising may
surface like leaping fish in the clear light of the full moon, flashing
with ephemeral rainbows, splashing down as an invitation
to the depths. words have no place in this domain where subtle rays of
love & compassion are silently healing with blessings of light.
here, deep down inside ourselves is a formless realm, yet it can be
known as if we are dark-sighted birds of the night, riding on that
visualpurple edge of reality that magnifies the
shimmer of mystery & wonder. with inner commitment we
enter that realm & offer greetings of friendly benevolence
in ambient tones that have no words, yet overflow with meaning.
You show me this, Shiva. You reveal the sublime OM of silence:
how to blend into the inner realm through the pure sonic sweetness
that rises up from that formless abode like ageless healing mantras.
You help to open the hidden gateway at my core to release
the arcane subtle awareness of the divine presence in all.
i rest in this. i melt in this. i make my home here, Shiva, in
the midst of all that You are teaching me now, including words too!
sometimes i am a garden lying fallow after harvest,
stripped of my nourishing abundance. my leaves are brown & crisp,
stalks & stems are brittle & broken, scattered on the resting
earth as a testament to blessings given generously.
i can breathe into the earth even when i cannot reach for
the shining sky, so i go deep, deep down past the spent dry roots.
i sleep, forgetful of bright springtime & sun, returning the
physical substance to its origin. i dream. i dream of
You, Shiva, Who planted me here & cultivated my pure
essence & reaped my natural bounty. it has emerged from
tiny hard seeds hidden in the darkness of the ground, & grown
to lift many arms & hands up to praise the sun & honor
the moon. it has been glorious, & i thank You, Shiva, as
i release the firm form into the cool darkness & soft dust
of the waiting earth. lying fallow is also part of the
process that yields the next abundant harvest in its own time.
hold me, Shiva. hold me as i rest quietly without care,
dreaming of formlessness & freedom from this human dharma.
some blessings are so amazing that i don't recognize them
as blessings for years, sometimes even decades. they are like the
mystic eggs of a strange bird, bound to hatch in their own time, placed
in the nest of me, knowing not what may come from them or when.
i have seen blessings change into challenges overnight &
challenges throw off their concealment to emerge as blessings.
therefore i will rejoice in the gifts of the moment, holding
them lightly that they may fly when they are called by destiny.
You teach me to regard blessing & challenge with equal eyes,
Shiva: as opportunity in disguise, to be esteemed.
i cannot court one without bowing to the other also.
we are all golden beneath the dust, deeply imprinted with
the urge to evolve into wholeness. there is no turning back,
no refusal to be what i yearn to be & am at heart.
i will protect these strange eggs, Shiva, & will accept what may
come from them with gentle respect for their divine origin.
we are the ones who keep the windows & doors of the world open
to new realities asking to enter & be acknowledged.
we are Shiva's followers, His devotees who have been dismissed from
the orderly world of known borders & allowed actions.
we are the outliers, the explorers & the outrageous ones
who will not be contained within the rulebook of society.
we are the ones who keep the windows & doors of the world open
for the mysterious divine beings who, like us, cannot be
contained within common limits, hence we are Shiva's acolytes.
He has given us a place of honor within His sacred life,
unlike the earthly, worldly realm of organized reality,
to demonstrate that no one is rejected or abandoned or
forgotten. all beings who seek truth & the real are welcome to
Shiva's band of followers & companions of deep mystery.
the abode of truth is so vast that nothing is left out & none
is ever really a solitary wandering being,
for we all travel in a vast reciprocal companionship
of interconnected life. Shiva, Your attendants salute You!
we are the ones who keep the windows & doors of the world open,
allowing free circulation of all the mixed blessings of life.
THIS HAPPENED 