i was blind for much of my life, Shiva: blind to Your presence & power, to You as the essence & core of all things & beings. i was unaware & drifting. i was blind to all but the surface. the superficial outer aspect lulled me to sleep in a deep hypnotic dreaming that was decades in length & deadening. yet night turns to day inevitably, thus i finally awaken when You relentlessly thrust me forth from my rut. it was furnished with my favorite things, though i chafed at its narrow restrictions. now my sight returns & i see the truth of Your presence. there's no escaping it. now that i see Your ubiquity, my heart frees the old bolts that held the door closed. my heart is vowed & pledged to You, Shiva. although i am a late bloomer, You wait until my blossom is full wide open. now i am here before You, patiently offering it to You in tender love. i'm blinded by the outer no longer, coming to You stripped of worldly dowry. i am transparent to Your ceaseless light, rainbows shining wherever You touch me, words dissolving like darkness into dawn.