i sold my mind for a few kind words & gave my body away, yet they could not really get to me for i hid behind the play. the passing people, their undreamed dreams, went by like shadow & dust. i grimly witnessed the storyline, i did what i knew i must. i turned my back on the human world. i wandered my blinded way & fell into a vast emptiness, night after night with no day. i cried for light & i begged for it yet turned away my head from every single kind offering of sustenance, & i fled. i could run, i could not hide from it & i could not veer away. i faced it all, i embraced the act, my part within the play. then i was dismembered with a knife & speared by a holy word. i bled my sadness, i bled my fear & i threw away my sword. i looked away from the play of dreams & long sought for something real, where heart & mind might find their true home, where then i could laugh & feel. many years have plodded past since then & much was explored & seen. i was not touched. though the lines were there, still i remained in between. until You came & that changed it all for You brought the world alive. You took my weary old cardboard life, the play, the dream, final dive -- You turned me around & upside down & also inside & out. You revealed the real within the fake & You took away my doubt. i sing now the song my heart calls forth in sweet tones like colors pure. the real is living within my soul, the rest I can now endure.